Religious Debates vs. Discretion

Some cool old quotes can help us avoid people problems today.

Philip Dormer Stanhope, the fourth earl of Chesterfield, gained fame as a British statesman and writer and was knighted with the title of Lord. In 1732, Stanhope, known more famously as Lord Chesterfield, had a son, also named Philip Stanhope.

Lord Chesterfield wrote a series of letters to his son containing words of wisdom on subjects such as education, love and character. These letters were later published after his death and, though they were written hundreds of years ago, they contain much wisdom that can help us get along with people today. As I read Lord Chesterfield’s sage advice, I was reminded of some similar advice recorded long ago in the pages of the Bible.

• “Wear your learning like a pocket watch and keep it hidden. Do not pull it out to count the hours, but give the time when you are asked” (brainyquote.com).

This is one of Lord Chesterfield’s most popular quotes. When I first read it, I was instantly reminded of a conversation my sister had several years ago.

During her freshman year of high school, my sister had several close friends in her classes. Though my sister did not share similar religious beliefs with these friends, they were able to speak openly about their opinions and thoughts.

One night my sister and her friend, we’ll call her Katy, got into a chat conversation about religion. Katy wanted to know what beliefs my sister held on different religious questions. My sister’s friend was in a bit of a debating mood that night, and it became clear later that she was trying to pick an argument.

As the conversation continued, things grew to a heated climax when Katy wrongly interpreted my sister’s words. She believed that my sister thought that she, Katy, was somehow not good enough for our beliefs. Thankfully, after a bit of time, things were cleared up. However, the sour impression left on Katy never completely disappeared.

• “Be wiser than other people, if you can, but do not tell them so” (brainyquote.com).

This quote is quite a humorous one, but it holds a lot of truth. Learning and understanding biblical truth gives us wisdom. With wisdom comes a lot of responsibility, and it must be used with caution. We must use insight to judge each situation, to consider why a person is asking religious questions and if the current moment is the best time to answer.

For example, if someone is asking questions so he or she can start up a religious debate, like Katy, then this is clearly a situation to avoid (Matthew 7:6).

The wisdom we have been given by God is a treasure. God expects us to use discretion when we use it to keep us out of trouble: “Whoever guards his mouth and tongue keeps his soul from troubles” (Proverbs 21:23).

Like Lord Chesterfield, our Heavenly Father has given us a long letter of advice filled with wisdom so His children could live happy lives. God gives us wisdom in His Bible not only about education, love and character, but about the importance of timing and guarding our words. “To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven. … A time to keep silence, and a time to speak” (Ecclesiastes 3:1, 7). We must figure out when is a good time to talk about a subject, when it would be best to hold off until later, and when it would be more appropriate to not talk about a certain subject at all.

• “Be your character what it will, it will be known, and nobody will take it upon your word” (inspirational-quotes.info).

If a situation comes up when it is best not to discuss religion or the Bible, then how will others ever learn about it? The old saying “actions speak louder than words” is very pertinent in such a situation. In 1 Timothy 4:12, it says, “Be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit,in faith, in purity.” No matter what the circumstances, we should always represent Jesus Christ through our actions and in the examples we are setting.

Taking the advice of Lord Chesterfield to heart, continue to always wear your pocket watch—your knowledge of the truth—because you never know when you will need to guide others with it; however, remember to use maturity and discretion in your words. The advice we have been given by our Father is a gift—let’s make sure we use it carefully.

For more about God's gift, the Bible, see "Why All the Fuss Over an Old Book?" and "The Greatest Book in the World."

Vivienne Villaescusa attends the Raleigh, North Carolina, congregation of the Church of God, a Worldwide Association, and is currently pursuing a degree in dance education.